What is TAR Anon?

TAR Anon™ is an international fellowship of survivors who share their experience, strength, and hope that each may solve their own personal TAR Tale and in doing so, help others recover from the emotional battlefield and collateral damage stemming from TARToxic Abusive Relationships.

TAR Anon provides a neuro-safe setting and program of recovery for those to become self-aware and focus on developing essential self-love. It is a trauma-informed safe path of emotional regulation while transforming lives in a healthy co-regulated, non-judgmental way, helping others in the process.

TAR Anon is powered by TAR Network™, an international 501(c)(3) and includes research-based Steps, Promises and even trained TAR Mentors who participate online and in person. Our Fellowship serves as the only supportive and accessible program for those who vitally need to come “out of the fog and into the light” after narcissistic abuse.

Have You Stepped in TAR?

The term TAR (Toxic Abusive Relationships) was coined by Dr. Jamie, who realized the need to establish a common vocabulary for defining and explaining relationships characterized by a trifecta of destructive traits: a lack of empathy, a refusal of accountability, and a manipulative, transactional, Machiavellian approach. Individuals caught in TAR are often ensnared in a web of emotional manipulation, gaslighting, and exploitation.

For typically unsuspecting and empathic people who’ve stepped in TAR, the experience is similar to being stuck in a thick, dark substance. This substance is a metaphor for the toxic elements that permeate these relationships – shame, blame, isolation, and trauma bonds. These dynamics are intensified by unresolved childhood wounds, making it challenging to break free from the cycle of abuse.

Recognizing the urgent need for support and understanding, Dr. Jamie, along with an international team of experts, founded the TAR Network. This organization serves as a beacon of hope for survivors of narcissistic abuse, offering a range of resources to aid in your healing journey.

TAR Anon Steps and Promises

Our Steps and Promises were developed to examine the toxic relationships with ourselves and others, to allow us to go from the Scars that bring us into the rooms and deliver us to becoming the STARs (Survivors of Toxic Abusive Relationships) that we are destined to be.


Steps are a research-based path followed in a self-paced manner with a TAR Mentor that will help survivors address their CPTSD, set boundaries, live in the world of either no-contact or modified contact, and avoid TAR Pits. It represents a journey to rebuild our lives, make healthier choices to prevent future toxic abusive relationships, and in doing so reach the abundance of Promises.


Promises highlight the potential positive results of recovery that await us. These Promises remind us recovery is possible and bring with it restored functioning and hope for our future. To achieve a healthier outlook on our lives, one must engage consistently and fairly in the path CPTSD recovery, as the root of our misfortunes lies a wounded inner child and our untreated Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Where and when?

Welcome, everyone, to meetings designed to help all of us through TAR. We’re here to deal with the aftermath of being stuck in TAR in both intimate and non-intimate relationships. Our goal is to foster an engaging, authentic new life of healing ourselves and the relationships around us.

TAR Anon meetings take place weekly online via Zoom. To join, click the button below, choose a meeting you want to register for, enter your name or pseudonym and an email address. You only need to do this once, whereupon you will receive updates and reminders for all future meetings, and a TAR Network Newsletter, which lets you keep up with all thing TAR.

How can you help?

Whether you are a survivor seeking support, an advocate wanting to make a difference, or someone curious to learn more, we invite you to join us on this important journey.

Help us make a lasting impact on the lives of survivors. Help us bring organizations, communities and individuals to support the cause. Become a Volunteer Ambassador of TAR Anon.

There is great strength in numbers – as empathic and compassionate human beings, we can bring hope, healing, and positive change to those affected by narcissistic abuse.

Subscribe to the TAR Network newsletter

Step out of the fog into the light. Register with TAR Network™ and receive our monthly newsletter filled with information on recovery from Toxic Abusive Relationships (TAR).

Meet our Allies

Who are we?